How to Get Past Emotional Pain

Everything we experience--no matter how unpleasant--comes into our lives to teach us something. To move on from something difficult, look for the lesson. Start by asking yourself: "If this is the way things are supposed to be, what can I learn from it?" Think about how you may have contributed to the painful experience, or if there was anything you could have done to prevent it. Often we don't realize the lesson because we'd rather avoid reliving the pain. But once you allow yourself to reflect on the sadness, anger, guilt, or shame you've been hiding, those feelings will begin to subside. Yes, someone hurt you. Once you've forgiven them and let go, you can move forward and begin creating the life you desire.

Stings

'I think there will come a time when it won't sting so bad...But I'm not quite there yet.' ~ Jennie Garth

I'm still way behind her. It still stings like hell for me...

Incomprehensible

In spite of whatever I might have gained during these few tumultuous months, I have yet to comprehend it. I admit that I'm a failure when it comes to this.

I found myself trying to pull myself out of my wondering thoughts from time to time even though I've been occupied by my daily tasks. It's like being pulled deeper and deeper into the abyss each moment.

Feeling so sorry not only for myself but to those who love and concern about me. They had done all that they should have done within their capabilities. They comforted me, they analyzed the entire situation for me and they reminded me that I deserved better. Time and time that they checked with me if everything is fine with me. My answer was never yes but maybe and through that they knew that I'm still pinning for it deep down inside. Even if I laughed louder than usual or smiled often than usual, I can't hide my pain from them. I'm feeling so guilty for not able to bounce back sooner and making them worried like that. I felt that I've let them down in spite of all those supports that they gave to me and all those hope that they have in me. Sometimes I couldn't even bring myself to see them in the eyes as I am too ashamed of dissapointing them.

Pushing It

I can foresee....

The day that I will workout so hard that I will not only breakout in sweats but tears as well. I will push myself hard just to make it. Gritting with crazy determination.

Whoever that say I can't make it, just wait and see. I will show them I will and I can make it.

Toxic

I think real friends will say words of encouragement not discouragement. Real friends never try to discourage you from doing something good to yourself. Real friends never encourage you to do things that will only harm you in long term.

Some toxic people out there.

Extricate

I can feel it coming. The coming of my extrication. The release from this mind boggling entanglement. I think it will come sooner than I thought.

I Must I Must

The workout has been intensified these few weeks. I must endure this. I must and I will make it. I shall not give up. Gambateh!!!

Diverting My Mind

Have been working out daily for a few weeks. Trying to transform my self image and at the same time keeping my mind occupied. Too much craziness in it. Hoping to channel my excess energy and whatever grudges I'm having to some where else that might be benefit from it.

081012

Feeling nauseous after working out. Must be overloaded on water earlier. Low electrolyte counts....

Saccharin Sweet Dreams

Red light, yellow light, green light go. Crazy little women in a one man show. Mirror queen, mannequin, rhythm of love. Sweet dream, saccharin, loosen up~ Def Leppard

Sunday Evening

Family dinner at Kayu Ara. Full to the max!

Guts

Guts? I think I have. It's the very thing that bought this catastrophe upon myself. Have I not dared to even give it a thought at the beginning, the bubbles that cocooned my emotions wouldn't have burst just like that. I will still be living an emotional steadied life and I will not have to experience that awful pain over and over again.

Honestly, it isn't something that conquered a big part of my existence. It was just for a while compared with what I've been through all my life. Just a tiny spot but it really hit where it hurts the most, my heart.

Stones and sticks can't break me, making me arise with more strength than ever from all other aspect of my life. My stubbornness enabled me to be who am I today and to refused to give up no matter what. Then this insane matter came along and put me into the most complicated situation I ever had to face. It had conquered my heart making me losing my own sense of directions. As if it's eating away the very essence of myself, I feel myself wasting away day after day.

I fought hard in this battle. I've tried to pull myself back from the abyss once too many times. I'm struggling here in the dark. I see the light on the other end, I really do. But it seems that no matter how I tried to march forward to it, it is still so far away. I will still continue to move towards the light even if it takes me forever to do so.

I just can't let myself wasted away because of it.

OOTD 071012

Back to basic with black PVC leggings with shirt in white and some dash of gold ornaments

The Dream Maker

The dream maker is being so persistent and insistent. Bringing the same dream, same character with a slight variation each time for every other days for almost 2 months now.

I'm learning to control my consciousness during my waking hours. Suppressing the thought of it. Sometimes if I'm busy enough, it is totally banished to some hidden dungeon in the some dark corner of my mind. But this crazy recurring dreams keep reminding me of it again and again, creeping into my mind at night creating all these uneasiness in me. It's my conscious mind dueling with my subconscious mind.

I don't have a clue of what that tragic episode going to brings to me except sadness and tears. Is it so significant that my dream maker has to make me go through this crazy cycle of dreams again and again? What is it trying to tell me? What's the hidden meaning behind it? What is hidden deep inside my subconsciousness that this matter has escalated to this point? Why does it affecting me so much that I can't escape it even in my dreams? How much longer do I need to endure this ordeal?

What kind of blessing in disguise in store for me this time? It is really worth for all the emotional havoc and breakdown that I'm going through right now?

Sizing You Up

Somehow I feel awkward at some social events. People look at you in a strange way. They whispered to the person next to them, then the other person will turn their head and look at your direction. And then they started to giggle.

These people usually formed a group among themselves and they only live within that circle. They don't know the basic courtesy of treating others with manners. It's like no other being is good enough for the group.

Most of the time I would just occupied my time by playing with my phone sitting at the corner alone. Who cares? Even worse if one of those people come over and talk to you suddenly.

They will start to ask all sorts of questions to gauge your current condition. An interrogation to be exact. They will ask about your occupation because they want to know if you are earning good income. If they found out that you probably not earning much, you'll see a smirk in their face. They will ask about your current marital status. If you are married they want to know about your spouse's occupation. If you are still single, they'll tell everyone else that nobody wants you that's why you are a spinster. Where do you stay? They want to know if you are staying in some upscale or some rundown place. They'll be very happy if you tell them it's somewhere around the latter's vicinity.

You can observe that the entire duration of the conversation, that their eyes and brain are busy sizing you up from top to toe. These people can really multitask, interrogating and doing calculation at the same time. At the end of the day their main agenda is purely curiosity and to find out if you are living a better live than theirs, nothing much.

A Brand New Day

The sun has taken its place again
Smelling the wonderful morning dews
The birds are chirping happily
Grasses seems greener than usual
Walking with a little spring in my steps

Good Night

“Fortune, good night; smile once more, turn thy wheel”
William Shakespeare

May all the best things happens for me in days to come

True feelings

Oops...

Oops! I did it again. Now who says I won't make it?

051012

Love this!

05102012

These people can shut their big mouth. I have no desire to listen to their so called opinion or concern or stupid questions.

Shut up....shut up....shut up

I Do What I Want

I wear what I want
I do what I want
I don't give a shit
And I'm so gonna to get this

No one can have a say in this

Some Crazy People

Somewhere, somehow in some corner of this world there's someone who really like to make you really feel bad about yourself. They tried to point out whatever that wasn't even bothering you as if you have committed a super faux pas yourself in front of the whole world just to bring you down and to elevate themselves further. Anyone can see that these people can't further elevate except to step on someone, elevated from there and stay there.

The worst thing is they are still pretending like you are their best friend. They cling to you like a cling wrap . They interrogate everything you do. They want to befriend your friends. They want to go where you go. If they can't succeed any of the above, they'll say things to dampen your day. Doing something to interrupt your plans. When in fact, they love to be with you so much because they think you are the only one that they can step on, bully and belittled.

Mad people

Bye September

My mood in September was a continuation from the chaos back in August. I've been working overtime to keep my emotions in check. Buried my head in my work during working hours and play hard after work. Trying to keep myself occupied.

The sadness do creep up on me on in a while but at least it's not as often as it initially did which is a good thing. Feel like a little girl lost sometimes but at the same time I've discovered a new side of everything else surrounding me.

Seeing the dark side of people whom I always thought were sincere to me. Those whom I never expected anything from were the biggest surprise that I had. Where have they been all my life?

A Glimmer Of Hope

I saw a glimmer of hope for myself.

Those little good morning messages on phone that I received every morning, I feel some human warmth. I'm so grateful for that.

Even though I'm still stucked in this grieving rut, I'm still as vain as ever. Been doing some simple workouts twice daily then without fail touching my belly hoping that they'll become smaller and flatter the first I wake up each morning.

Making new discoveries of my outfits daily with all those creative pairings. Posting the picture of my daily outfits trying to create some new memories.

Something I could do to make myself a little happier.

The Darkness

Another dark period here. The sun simply refused to shine on this part. No sun ray that could penetrate the darkness yet. Nothing can be done to reduce the coldness in it.

I'm still shivering here. Trying to helplessly to lit a candle but it just wouldn't light up. Sitting in the coldness where no other soul around. The chill goes straight to the spine and heart giving the numbing sensation. It could be good for the pain.

How long do I need to wait before the sun shines here again?

Shots Of Anger and Resentment

Every single arrow shot means a single shot of anger in me. How many more before I don't feel angry anymore?

Will the anger and resentment in me ever subside?

Dreams

The recurring dreams, what are they trying to tell me?

I know that I've been thinking about it all the time, consciously. But subconsciously, what does it mean?!

Catching Up

My diary is being filled up to the max. Day trips, stand up comedies, archery galleries, dinners with buddies, catching up over a drink or two etc....etc. Never knew where all these energies from. I used to be a super lazy person. I always felt that I'm already so tired after work that I just wanna stay at home. Now it's just a 360 degree turnaround for me.

It's good to catch up on what I've been missing out all these years.

My So Called Friends

By now, I can really call it 'A blessing in disguise'. Actually no one but a few. This incident had forced me to open my eyes wide. Wide enough to see who's the bad apple among them.

So called friends who judged me on my situation. What makes you think you can judge me? Are your character really blemish free? You never did anything wrong in your entire existence? Who do you think you are? GOD?

So called friends who abandoned me during the time when I need them the most. Where are you when I needed the emotional support the most? You don't give a shit even when I asked for help. You never concern about my well being.

So called friends who are only around during the good times. These people only appear during the jolly time. The rest, they avoided you like a plague. Not that I want to borrow or beg from you.

So called friends who are plain selfish. Even if I'm dying by the roadside, I don't think you'll stop your car and help me. You'll just continue driving.

So much for calling themselves my friends. Anyway, I must really thank one person but I'm not able to mention his name here. Let's just call him Mr.B here. If it's not for you, I wouldn't have seen the true colors of those so called friends. If it's not for you, I wouldn't have the comparison between good apples and bad apples.

Maybe your definition of being friends and mine being friends are 2 difference thing. At least I know that I should lend my friends a shoulder to cry on whenever they needed it. To accompany them through the bad times even though I don't know what I can do to help.

It's really an opener for me this time. Something different happened that exposed a totally different thing. Something unexpected.

Just Plain Me

Tears had dried up,
Wounds had been healed,
Emotional pain was lessened,
Physical pain was lessened too.

What is left were just memories,
What is bothering me was just me.

It's stubbornness,
It's denial,
It's silliness,
It's just plain me.

Fading Away

The excruciating pain slowly fades away. It still pains whenever my thoughts wasn't being occupied. But the pain doesn't make me cry anymore .

Stab In The Heart

It was like a stab to the heart,
Then it was twisted around,
Blood gushed out everywhere,
Till you were running out of breath.

The pain was so real,
That you could actually feel it,
The sharpness of the blade,
As it pierced through your heart.

Everything else was blurred,
Nothing seems to make sense now,
Covered by the warmth of the blood,
The heartbeats slowly fades away.

12 Days Of Pain

It's been 12 days,
Since that dreaded Monday,
That he has left her heart,
On the ground to bleed.

It's been 288 hours,
That she has been crying,
Crying her face off day and night,
Alone for the entire ordeal.

It's been 17'280 minutes,
That he has abandoned her,
Playing the games of ignorance,
Of what she's going through.

It's been 1,036,800 seconds,
Since she being obligated,
Into accepting the fate,
That was lay out for her.

Pain

A torturing moment when you thought you could forget about it for the time being by drowning your head with distractions. The worst thing is you being sober for the entire time. Nothing can be done to drown out the pain. There's no way to escape at all.

It's Complicated

To argue or to have a dispute with a
fellow Geminian is like fighting with your inner self. You'll never win in any way.

The Gemini In Me

Complicated, difficult, eccentric, annoying, hot tempered, super bitch are how some described me. I'm both extrovert and introvert. I can be the life of the party and also the wallpaper at the same time. Even I can't predict myself, just like Dr Jekyll and Miss Hyde. 2 different persona sharing 1 physical body, each must takes turn to have its says.

Extreme is the best word to describe myself. There's no in between for me especially when it comes to human interaction. It's either hate or love, very simple. Black or white but never grey for me. I could be very rational one moment but falling head over heels with the wrong guy. Had a clear mind about what I want in a guy and proceeded to throwing all the cautions to the wind finally.

My attention span is way shorter than a 3 years old kid and it will never grow further than that even as I aged. One minute, I'm into baking, the next one I might go for skateboarding and so on. Just like a computer, you can have a few tabs opened at the same time but none of them are working at the optimum level and they'll be crashing anytime soon. In the end, none of the tasks can be completed. From dreaming of being a ballerina to be a baseball player PHEW...I wonder if I can live long enough to get myself to be involved in all these activities.

Everything about me is like a flip of a coin. There's always 2 sides of me in every aspect. Yin and Yang. IDK if this is what they called a balance element but I sure know that I'm always capable of driving people around me up the wall. Sometimes it is because of me that they too had conjured the split persona in them. Usually they are very forgiving and love me to bits but there are times that they wanted to kill me too.

A former colleague only dared to tell me what she thought of me when she had finally left the company. That I was a very stubborn person and things will always has to be my way and no other ways. Someone who refused others opinion. She felt very irritated and annoyed by me sometimes. She has seen me flaring up in anger not once or twice but on a numerous occasions. I'm not the easiest person for her to please but somehow she thought that I'm a very adorable person. Like a child, crying and screaming and then playing and laughing again in the shortest period of time like nothing had happened at all. That's what she told me. At least if she dislike one part of me, there's still another different part of me that she likes in me.

There are simple to many negative attributes in me that drove others away from my life. Any other sane person would very much wanted to change to be a better person but not me. I'm not budging at all. I think it's what who made me who I am today and allowing me to have what I have today. If there's someone out there who couldn't accept me for who I am, they never did genuinely love me as a person. These people can just get the hell out of my life.

Anyway, I must really salute to those who had endured so much of my crazy episodes all these times. You people are the best in my life for I know that I would never be able to handle or tolerate another person like myself. Not in a million years.

Being Stubborn

It's as if some invisible force took over your body and mind. You are getting irrational and acted like a fool. You started to get reckless and tried to do all sorts of crazy things that you normally won't do. You know it's dangerous across that border but yet you still refused to back out. You know it's impossible but yet you are still being stubborn. Stop being so difficult and stop daydreaming about the impossible things in life. You have much more important things in life ahead.

Where Has My Sanity Gone?

Something's not right here.

It's been super duper hectic for me this couple of weeks. Designing, modifying, calculating....Phew..Sleeping for only a few hours daily and waking up early running all over the town. Crazy zits popping out due to stress. Started to get delusional where my emotions going through a massive roller coaster ride. My sanity slowly wasting away and I don't know what the heck is wrong with me. All sorts of nonsense going in and coming out from myself.

It's crazy. I don't supposed to have time for all these nonsense  when my schedule is filling up to the max but my brain seems to have its own way of filling up those tiny haircrack with some impossible stuffs where my emotions and mood keep spiraling downward. It's like I woke up one day and found myself in maze. I walked and walked for days to find my way out but the deception of the place is taking me further and into the trap with every step I take.

Getting annoyed with myself as more time has passed. Blasting the stereo loud to drown out the crazy thinking in my mind. It helps but just a little.

Still trying to find my way out of the maze now or until my sanity returns.....

Day 3: Rat Race Or Peace At Zagreb

Something for my Baby Elise, a huggable and breathing battery operated mutt and it's super adorable.

Not sure if she'll tore it apart the moment she sets her paws on it though. 

 My sister thought it was a real thing and kept asking how the hell am I going to go through the airport with it.

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Been missing my baby alot. Just had to talk to  her with Facetime midway through my breakfast and everyone thought that I have a human daughter, funny.

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We left for Zagreb right after breakfast and it took us 4 hours to get there. After spending half of my time abroad on a coach, now I could sleep on the road and be able to wake up whenever the coach slows down. When it slows down, it means we have arrived at our destination.

Love this restaurant where they have a beautiful white interior. Modern and nice.

Can anyone tells that I just woke up a few minutes earlier before this picture was taken?

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Zagreb Cathedral is the most famous building in Zagreb and the tallest building in Croatia. This place brought a sense of serenity into my heart where every problems seem to be in absence at that very moment. It's where you can almost hear the angels singing.

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Where you will be enthralled and believed in miracles that God had created. Making you momentary forgotten that you still have a long and winding way on this crazy world. It really feels good to be here.

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I would stay here forever if I could, to get away from the harsh reality of my current life. It's truly an undecisive thinking of mine. Can I really give up everything to have a sense of peace or can I give up having a sense of peacefulness for my ambitions? Let's just put this to the hands of fate, if I'm meant to spend the rest of my life quietly or to continue this rat race.

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 Strolling along on a former river that separates these two banks in this city where bloodshed happened before it became the way it is today.

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Bloodshed on the other side and tearshed on this side. Museum of Broken Relationships, my tales could fill up this entire place!

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At the park where the locals walk their dogs and for a public show of affections. Couples rolling around on the grass cuddling and kissing each others like those in the movies. It's romantic in the reels but not in the reality, where you might be ended up rolling around on dog's wee wee and poo poo!

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Catch of the day

Chocolates, luncheon meat, foie gras, pate, truffle.....

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Calling it a day at Four Points

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My Tears

If I could find tears within my heart because this, I might be able to find 'it' again. I maybe crying of pain or happiness but not for 'this'. I'm not able to cry for 'this' and IDK if I ever able to do it again.

Dear Ian

*Hugs*At least you found him and you know that you love him. You dared to love and to love him from afar. That shows that you are still lovable and hope you'll find that special someone to share your principles and believe in life soon.

It's been a long and winding journey for me. I never went beyond liking someone these few years and I wonder if I still able to love someone like any warm blooded human does. I've tried hard to find that feelings within me again. Lost count of how many times that I failed.

Maybe I've lost it forever, IDK

Sadness

Feeling a little sad now. Can't push it away and it's sticking to me like a glue. Just how many times do I have to go through this? Struggling with hopelessness and sadness just for a sniff of happiness and it wasn't even real. I'm getting so bloody tired this time.

Life Is Cruel

I was just passing by the boutique on my way to get my daily caffeine fix when the mannequin caught my eyes. It was wearing the loveliest dress that my eyes ever laid on. I just had to own it. And then I was told that it was the last piece and it was already taken, awaiting the lucky owner to collect it.

Just like the other aspect of my life, 'things' I like are always taken and they will never be mine. Life is cruel...

Disastrous Dates

Things in life always take unexpected turns for me. It's always almost a guaranteed major disappointment awaits whenever I'm expecting something. And most of the time when the disappointment has set in, that's when surprise awaits me. Just because when you are not expecting anything then.

Just like those blind dates that my friends arranged for me.At first I went along happily hoping to meet someone special, dressing up nicely for the occasion until the whole thing went downhill from the moment both of we shakes hands. He has nothing that I want in my dream guy, full stop. Went home disappointed while trying hard not to look like it. This repeats and repeats until I have finally lose the happily ever after plot from my heart.

I vowed, no more blind dates but not until this last one because my friend has already arranged for me. Fine, one bloody last one for me and I turned up the date with a I-Don't-Give -A-Shit attitude and appearance. Suddenly, this has become the biggest regret in my entire adult life! Kicked myself right there and then for turning up the way I am now. I called this DISASTER.

SHIT !SHIT ! SHIT ! Why are the pranks are always on me?!

Excuse me, you looked familiar to me

Do I have a face that looks like those mass produced dolls where each of them came from the same mold? Do I looked like everyone else? Don't I look like myself? Is my face that common?

Why do people keep mistaken me from someone else?

I'm Not Impressed At All

Some stainless steel diamond ring, some newly bought expensive handbags, some managerial position at work...BLA...BLA...BLA....

Some people are pure opportunist. Ones that never missed out a single chance to show off, like everyone else is blind and dumb. Who doesn't know about Tiffany&Co? What about those expensive Prada, Louis Vuitton( I bet most of those who flaunt them in my face couldn't even pronounce the name correctly) and so on. Not that they are the only one who owned those things and I'm not blind you know? Pure bitches.

Then there's this nobody that introduce himself as some manager to me. He's trying to tell me that he's somebody when his actions proved otherwise. Thinking that I was born yesterday and maybe I would be impressed? Hell not, I blocked him right away!

Why do you have to rub it in others face? You must be super desperate. Craving for others acknowledgement of your standing in the society? Pathetic...

Communication Error

The world is getting smaller and smaller. Communication is very convenient nowadays. You can speak to anyone at anytime from anywhere in the world easily. It makes everyone's life seems easier but not mine. It made mine a nightmare.

Here's why:

1. Some inconsiderate always call at the wrong time especially when I'm sleeping. It's either late at night or early in the morning. Had to turn my phone to silent mode and these had also made me missed a few important calls.

2. Gone were the days where we used to be very punctual for our appointments. When we said "Meet you under the bridge at 3pm" it really means so. Nowadays? " I'll call you when I reach there" but what time exactly? I could be waiting for you from 3pm to 3am!

3. Had to come up with better excuses to avoid somebody. I can't pretend that I'm not at home anymore! If I leave calls unanswered pretending to be busy, someone might sees me on Facebook playing games!

4. Whenever I'm trying to aim for high scores in FourSquare, there's always someone messaging me to question why am I doing there or why am I not asleep yet. I don't know what makes them think that I have to answer them about that.

5. People came to me asking why haven't i accept them as friend on Facebook yet, why can't they see my profile and why did i delete them as friend. Isn't it obvious that I don't want you to be my friend and yet you are still bothering me? Please stop harrasing me with your stupidity! I DON'T WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND , as simple as that.

And there are so much more that I couldn't continue here as there's an idiot that keeps calling me and she's not even looking for me because she got the wrong number as I'm blogging about this.

Pondering Over Today's Dinner

Do you know? Do you know that you have been missing out a lot of good things in life. Too much had escape like trying to catch water in your fist. When you are willing to open up your palms, you are able to cupped some water in them. When your heart is open, naturally good things will come to you.

It's funny how my life and food entwined. Like how I avoided food with black coloring just because of some old wives tales. My attire of the day dictates what's for lunch. No curry if I'm in white. No pungent food if I'm working, had to pick out all those scallions one by one. Having durian with fork and spoon and only on the evening of the day before my day off. No sizzling or hot stone or self barbecue food because I'm afraid of the smoky smell that lingers afterwards. Because of all this, I've been missing out plenty of nice food. Went to Pepper Lunch at IMM for dinner and it was so nice that I've been kicking myself for not trying out earlier. Only to came this far to discover this nice place when I always passed by the restaurant while I'm on errands back home.

Some may think that I'm nuts to fussed over small matter like this but I'm the type that think and worry too much. It's also where I learned to interpret the meaning and purpose of everything that is happening around me.

Something gotta change for good...

If I Am Invited, Please Be Respectful Then

So much bullshits in your life. You are invited to join a group for nostalgic reason. But almost everything is in a language that you couldn't read. Why the hell are you being invited then? Maybe youcan start a page and post everything in some language like Finnish or something. Some time wasting damn stuffs. Or did you miss something here?
Disrespectful, I shall say.

A Lesson Learned

A note to myself: Just because you think that he's the nicest and most diplomatic one among the bunch, doesn't mean that he will take you as a friend. Don't overestimate your own position in others life. You are just another face in the crowd. You are nobody to them.

Don't you feel that you are the biggest idiot in the world for thinking that you'll be invited? Preparing for it while it went past you almost silently until someone else pointed it out to you. Have you ever feel like banging your stupid self against the wall? Sad? Dissapointed?

The moral of the story?
1.Never ever be so sure of things in life.
2. The outcome may leave you scarred for life.
3.Some people just don't deserve to have you as a friend.
4. Tell them to F.U.C.K O.F.F when they try to be friendly with you and also if they asked for help from you in future.

Save yourself the heartache. You have much better things to do than to mingle with people that dont appreciate you.

Day 2:Narcissism Overload at Budapest

Good morning everyone ☀! It's 6:56am here and it's so bright already! Actually the sun comes out at 5am here.

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Having wonderful breakfast@Novotel Budapest

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The first hurdle of the day : Going up this staircase involved a lot of hardwork for me. There goes all my
breakfast.

Fishermen's Bastion, here I come!

Bronze statue of Stephen I of Hungary between the Fishermen's Bastion and the Matthias Church. 

The Grand Prince of the Hungarian (997–1000) and the first King of Hungary (1000–1038).

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Standing at one of the seven towers represent the seven Magyar tribes that settled in the Carpathian Basin in 896

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In the heart of the seventh largest church of medieval Hungarian Kingdom, the late gothic style Matthias Church.

http://instagr.am/p/Ka7wHZHNpK/

Visiting the  Hősök tere (meaning "Heroes' Square" in Hungarian) next. It's one of the major squares here.

During the moment when I was able to loosen up a bit, something unresolved crept up on me. I wonder how many good men out there that I've overlooked out there all these years or maybe they never even exist in my universe? I guess it will remains as a question mark until this moment.

http://instagr.am/p/Ka8t3nHNpq/

Sigh...Whatever....
The best thing that I could give myself right now is being able to be who I am. Not trying to supress myself from doing things that I love and being forced to do things I hated or having to entertain individuals that clashes with my principles.

On a more optimistic note, Mr Bear will be coming home with me.....

http://instagr.am/p/Ka-LfbnNqP/

Going underground:Budapest Metro, the second oldest underground metro system in the world and one of the registered World Heritage site.



http://instagr.am/p/Ka-Lf8HNqQ/
 
Having a cup of Macciato to wind down afterwards

http://instagr.am/p/Ka-Lg2HNqR/

Dropping by at the Opera House, they have a cozy little souvenir shop just at the corner.

Later on we had dinner at this nice restaurant which was converted from a former wine cellar. We went underground and it was so cooling here.

http://instagr.am/p/Ka-cC0nNqZ/
 
And finally I had to part with 10 Euro for this bottle of wine which has my picture on it. Narcissism had better of me..

http://instagr.am/p/Ka-rsQHNqe/